Baylink - The Things I Think
A suitably breast-impressed guy.

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Just what is this place about, anyway? I'm E-pinionated

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Oh, crap.

If you live near a coast (like, within 200 miles?), you need to get on the phone. Probably to your US Congresscritters.

Welcome to the hurricane season.

Friday, June 2, 2000 @ 10:31 a.m. - Comment

Anyone who says that people are worthless

needs to see this thread on MetaFilter. Everyone "played fair", as far as I could see... and some of the stuff people posted was absolutely *cool*.

I, myself, want the half-pint Klein Bottle.

Go watch how it unfolded...

Thursday, June 1, 2000 @ 12:57 p.m. - Comment

"It does that because... because it's a computer"

Oh, my ghod...

The latest RISKS Digest is out. It includes the usual plethora of interestingnesses, not the least of which is an oops concerning mail filters. This ought to be on your regular reading list.

Monday, May 29, 2000 @ 05:53 p.m. - Comment

Full Disclosure

Would you vote for this guy for U.S. Senator?

I would, even though, as someone pointed out over on MetaFilter, I'm not sure I'd want to elect anyone who hadn't done at least some LSD... :-)

Monday, May 29, 2000 @ 01:04 p.m. - Comment

Opinions on Granny Earp

If you've been following, I've been involved in a long discussion thread on Metafilter, toward the end of which I posted a link to a St Pete Times article on 55yr old grandmother Sandra Suter, who foiled an armed robbery at a Pasco County Wal-Mart this week.

Here's a link to some letters to the editor, mostly complimentary, about her reaction to the crime.

Saturday, May 27, 2000 @ 07:11 p.m. - Comment

Well, The Largo PD finally fired someone

over this Explorer sex thing.

The Public Information Officer?

Saturday, May 27, 2000 @ 01:12 p.m. - Comment

Open Source...

open relationships?

Why the hell not?

Friday, May 26, 2000 @ 09:25 a.m. - Comment

Dads Against Deadbeat Dates

Wanna go out with *my* daughter, do you?

Ok, son: fill out the application.

[ Is the fact that I was listening to Meredith Brooks' "Bitch" while posting this Richter-scale irony, or *what*? Via Riothero. ]

Thursday, May 25, 2000 @ 01:07 a.m. - Comment

What happens...

when you introduce a contagion in a monoculture population with little natural resistance?

You get the ILOVEYOU virus.

Purdue security expert (and really cool guy who helped me help SPJC get Usenet 17 years ago -- when I could still read *all* of it) Gene Spafford explains why.

[ Thanks to Camworld -- some of us credit all our second generation links... :-} ]

Thursday, May 25, 2000 @ 12:38 a.m. - Comment

Blather, wince, repeat.

"Our motto: 'Give me ambiguity, or give me something else.'"

[ Thanks to Twernt, who's been even twerntier than usual, lately. I love the "where are they now", thing; check this site for the Bailey Quarters saga. Damn, she was pretty. She still is, for that matter. ]

Wednesday, May 24, 2000 @ 11:38 p.m. - Comment

Just a good ole' boys...

never meaning no harm... beats all you never saw, been in trouble with the law since the day they was born.

Wednesday, May 24, 2000 @ 01:14 a.m. - Comment

Thank you, Lilly!

You've earned your day off by finding this Tom Lehrer invu, and pointing out to me that the box set is due this week.

Lehrer puts it a little differently. Why did he quit performing?

``Well,'' he says, ``because I didn't think I could do it. I don't mean I can't get out there and perform the old songs'' -- in the numbers he re-recorded for the Rhino box last fall, his voice sounds little different than it did in 1953 -- ``but I certainly don't want to do that.'' He's written a few new songs over the years, but not many, and of those few were keepers.

I pray to ghod he changes his mind before he dies. Lehrer is one of those musicians I'd drive to another state to see... and I live halfway down Florida; that *means* something from here...

Wednesday, May 24, 2000 @ 12:32 a.m. - Comment

You know you've not only arrived

but departed, when there's an entire Yahoo category devoted to you vs. the rest of the world parodies.

I pity th'fool who follows this link...

Wednesday, May 24, 2000 @ 12:17 a.m. - Comment

Not only doesn't the Klingerman Virus make you wear women's clothing...

it doesn't even exist. *I* don't seem to get these things, but my friends do. One just did, and forwarded it to me to confirm or deny. I didn't need to. The St Pete Times did that for me.

Nice of them; don't you think?

Tuesday, May 23, 2000 @ 06:15 p.m. - Comment

Who, me? Sexy?

Salon deconstructs Britney Spears. It's not particularly pleasant...

Tuesday, May 23, 2000 @ 12:38 p.m. - Comment

Well, my hit counts

for the last 48 hours confirm my instincts: hang out with pretty girls with big breasts, you get more attention that way. :-)

I'm going off to (ooh, aah) clean out my van, and maybe even wash it. Cool, huh? Playing with Netscape 6 Preview Release one. So far it has not (knock on plastic) crashed once. It's not doing everything exactly correctly, but it's still a preview, after all.

If it bugs me bad enough, I suppose I can go hit bugzilla and report... I'll see how PR2 looks, though, I think.

I'm using the 'Sullivan' skin from Cam Barrett's Alphanumerica (Moz6 is skinnable from XUL text scripts; it's actually quite cool) and the skin, while not quite tuned to my 640 monitor, is much better than the factory look.

Wonder when the "Wright" skin will be out. ;-) (just duck going through doors if you install it; Wright was only 5'9".)

Sunday, May 21, 2000 @ 04:11 p.m. - Comment

Gun Control

is being able to hit your target.

There another guns flap going over on MetaFilter; you *know* what side *I'm* on...

Here are some facts that explain why...

Saturday, May 20, 2000 @ 07:15 p.m. - Comment

Encyclopedia Brown

and the Case of the Pirated MP3's.

Classic stuff.

Trust me. I know.

Saturday, May 20, 2000 @ 01:30 p.m. - Comment

Where was technology like this

when we were growing up and needed it?

Saturday, May 20, 2000 @ 01:27 p.m. - Comment



Saturday, May 20, 2000 @ 01:11 p.m. - Comment

Someday, some way

we'll find a new way of studying...

I think this is cool, and not solely because this is one of my three favorite musicals of all time.

Saturday, May 20, 2000 @ 01:08 p.m. - Comment



There are gonna be a lot of happy construction workers... and one *pissed off* insurance company.

Saturday, May 20, 2000 @ 01:04 p.m. - Comment

Gotta get a fake ID

Just don't try getting one over that nasssty Internet.

I'm getting more than a little sick and tired of this shit. The only difference is that they're easier to find. The Internet otherwise has nothing to do with it.

Saturday, May 20, 2000 @ 12:51 p.m. - Comment

Rant: Stupid Advertiser Tricks

I was driving in to the office this morning, and heard a radio spot for Rooms To Go, a retail furniture wholesale/retailer based in Lakeland, about 60 miles east of me.

Their current commercial picks on the word "accrue". "Accrue means to add up", they say. "At Rooms To Go, your finance charges won't add up; Rooms To Go pays them!"

Ok; shall we pick that stupidity apart item by item? ;-)

They're picking on a line from a commercial that says this: "Finance charges will accrue, but will be credited if paid in full by the June 2000 due date." That is: if you pay the stuff off on time, we'll pay your interest, otherwise, you're gonna pay it.

Ok, you found the first hole, right?

Second: well if they don't add, up, how is *RTG* gonna pay them, either; they just won't exist at all.

But my favorite is this: the language they're harping on here? It was their damned commercial in the first place. From their 1998 "Pay nothing until the year 2000" ad campaign.

Ad agencies think we have *such* short memories.


Saturday, May 20, 2000 @ 12:40 p.m. - Comment

Thanks, Bondgirl...

I'm afraid I haven't sent too many people to The Breast Chronicles in the last 24 hours... because a lot of them *came* from there; welcome, folks. Site counters don't track gender... but I'd be mightily interested....

Saturday, May 20, 2000 @ 12:37 p.m. - Comment

Well, at least ILOVEYOU was only *annoying*...

That's what we all said, right?

But watch out, we said, the next version will probably be nasty.

We were right.



Friday, May 19, 2000 @ 12:00 p.m. - Comment


Ok, breasts.

Anyone who knows me well will tell you that the only surprise is that the entry took *so long* to get posted.

Thanks to Beth, I've come across a weblog written by a pair of breasts. I'm pleased to be able to say that the tone of the site is saucy, rather than salacious, taking a serious approach to the topic, but not failing to have some fun with it.

I'm also pleased to be able to say that they're *very* pretty breasts.

If the picture that I found by applying Ashworth's Law is of the same individual, the young lady to whom they're attached merits the same appraisal... and that's really nice, because, to quote Spider, "A woman whose breasts are her best feature is in for a miserable life." [ UPDATE: Yep, that's her. Very pretty young lady indeed. You want proof; *you* find her picture. I did... :-) ]

And, except for a poor choice of counter (try Sitemeter, Charlotte; I've been very happy with them), the site design is pretty crisp, too. I'd never seen a site with a *horizontal* layout... but it works. Even fit on my 640 monitor.

"Feeling Sexy", her iMood indicator says.

Am I allowed to agree? :-)

It seems she also writes a 'real' weblog (her words), and from it, she pointed to a wildly amusing smut site: Hoot Island. Recommended.

Friday, May 19, 2000 @ 11:09 a.m. - Comment

And so you thought...

Bill Gates had a spiffy house...

Friday, May 19, 2000 @ 10:32 a.m. - Comment

I swear to ghod...

the next smart-ass who steals my right mouse button to pop up cutesy-pie little dialogs like "there's no need to right click here", I'm gonna beat the shit out of.

Like, if I'm the sort of person to use the right button to get to 'Back' on the menu, I'm not gonna know that all I have to do is switch off JavaScript to steal their precious image files...

And don't even get me started about NS4 moving that menu item around to put stuff on top of it; I *sure* hope that's been fixed in Moz5/NS6.

Friday, May 19, 2000 @ 01:07 a.m. - Comment

Ghod, I hate being sick...

The day off, sleeping, was nice, but the being miserable part isn't especially fun...

Thursday, May 18, 2000 @ 03:23 p.m. - Comment

Well, here's something unusual

A television critic, who's happy with news coverage. Don't see much of that.

And Deggans isn't especially notable for being soft on bad TV, the Weekly Planet's concerns about the conglomerating of Tampa Bay media (which I share) notwithstanding. [ A link would go here, but for some reason, the Planet's website isn't rendering... ]

Tuesday, May 16, 2000 @ 12:55 p.m. - Comment

I'd hate to be this guy...

Largo Police Chief Jerry Bloechle is between a rock and a hard place. His community want to hear some painful honesty about his Police Explorer fracas...

but anything he says can and will be used against him in a court of law.

Sucks to be him, I guess.

Tuesday, May 16, 2000 @ 11:23 a.m. - Comment

Fictional Local Woman Mentioned in Satirical News'paper'

CLEARWATER, FL--J.P. McQuade's, a popular Clearwater-area singles bar, contained a single woman Saturday night

You gotta love The Onion

Sunday, May 14, 2000 @ 03:24 p.m. - Comment

And the hits just keep on coming...

I'm glad *I* don't work for the Largo Police Department.

Sunday, May 14, 2000 @ 01:04 p.m. - Comment

Results of mineral-laden irrigation water

stir new sense of awe...

Saturday, May 13, 2000 @ 11:39 a.m. - Comment

Here's a *very* well written

letter from the mother of a gay Vermont teen, to the letters column of the local paper up there. I disgree with her only on one point:

You use religion to abdicate your responsibility to be thinking human beings.

No. They use religion to cover for their inability to be thinking human beings.

Friday, May 12, 2000 @ 08:24 p.m. - Comment

My only question is...

where were women like this when *I* was 14?

Friday, May 12, 2000 @ 07:51 p.m. - Comment


it's so hard to maintain, sometimes.

I've been spending a lot of time, lately, at MetaFilter. It's a 'community weblog', which, for those of you who didn't come *here* from *there*, means that anyone who's registered can post a story on it... which means, of course, that it's more widely focussed than some single-editor 'logs.

Not that you could say that *this* one is especially tightly focussed, but...

It does leave me, though, with a quandary when it comes time to post a story: where do I put it? I tend to look at it this way: I write at Meta for the readers; bere, I write for me.

And I haven't been doing much of that lately, work being what it is. It will be this bad for maybe another week, and then I should have a little more free time again.

On other topics: I didn't win the Lottery last night. But it's ok: you didn't either. :-)

[ of course, if you *did*... can I be your friend? :-} ]

Thursday, May 11, 2000 @ 06:23 p.m. - Comment

Rant: Are there any women out there

who aren't neurotic?

The more I try to be nice to people, the more I decide that there's just no percentage in it.

I'm getting pretty goddamned sick and tired of it, if you wanna know the truth.

Thursday, May 11, 2000 @ 03:36 p.m. - Comment

Apparently, I'm not the only one

who thinks that the Largo Police Department is having an incredible amount of difficulty with their lifestyle.

Wednesday, May 10, 2000 @ 12:00 p.m. - Comment

"I don't know if I'd even call in to work"...

A Chicago machinist, on what he would do if he won the $350M lottery.

"No... I don't know if I'd have my people call in..."

I love it.

Wednesday, May 10, 2000 @ 11:51 a.m. - Comment

Gratuitous link to my sister

Pam runs a website, roughly a weblog, I guess, that covers the trials and travails of Being Scott Bakula. If you're a Leaper, closet or otherwise, check her out.

Monday, May 8, 2000 @ 10:54 p.m. - Comment

Ayes 418, Nays 1

Ron Paul is the one. Dr. No, they call him. I'm almost tempted to move to Texas, just so this guy can represent me.

He was the only dissenter 21 times in this Congressional term; 27 times the previous. And he's a Libertarian.

My kinda guy. Wonder if he'll move to Florida.

Monday, May 8, 2000 @ 02:52 p.m. - Comment


It's so nice to see someone who understands...

The Cavalier CSS-64 Coke machine.

[ from the cool, if somewhat uneven, Inconspicuous Consumption, via the ever-perspicacious Girlhacker. I've unframed the page; my apologies, but there still doesn't appear to be a way to bookmark framed pages. ]

Monday, May 8, 2000 @ 12:05 p.m. - Comment

Foster parents get arrested...

for child neglect?

No, it's not what you think: they had to lock one out of the house because they were afraid he'd hurt the other 15. A sad, weird story.

Monday, May 8, 2000 @ 10:50 a.m. - Comment

Lawyers need love, too

They're also not that bright...

In a related story, an arrest has been made in the 'LoveBug' 'virus' case.

Monday, May 8, 2000 @ 10:01 a.m. - Comment

Here's another view

of Herbie, the Love Bug.

Saturday, May 6, 2000 @ 10:41 p.m. - Comment

"This is a rock, not something that can fall to the ground"

That's the tone of most of the Microsoft posturing concerning the fact that it was Microsoft Quality Software that played the largest part in exposing millions of computers to billions of dollars of potential damage from the 'Love Bug' 'Virus' (it was actually a tapeworm).

Or so says Phil Agre's Red Rock Eater News Service piece on the situation, with which I whole heartedly agree.

It's well known that I am not, in the least, a Microsoft apologist. No, they do not get everything wrong. But they *are* arrogant, as a corporation, and that *is* responsible for the large majority of problems experienced by the people who "choose" (shyeah, right) to use their software.

Saturday, May 6, 2000 @ 10:06 p.m. - Comment


to Mission Control.

[ Thanks to starduck at Metafilter ]

Saturday, May 6, 2000 @ 12:23 p.m. - Comment

Proving his point perfectly

I hereby link to EricBrooksDotCom -- the site of one of the people on Metafilter who has been being *nice* to me in my recent turmoil over on MetaFilter.

All *I* wanna know is: Does he have a moustache?

Friday, May 5, 2000 @ 05:55 p.m. - Comment


I wonder why "sushi NEAR (naked OR nude) NEAR (woman OR girl)" hit *my* site...

I mean, I know I talk about some weird stuff, but...

Friday, May 5, 2000 @ 04:19 p.m. - Comment

Don't Forget...

It's almost National Masturbation Day; May 7th.

But hey, no need to be formal.

Come as you are.

Thursday, May 4, 2000 @ 11:18 p.m. - Comment

I hereby resign...

Courtesy of Lilly (to whom best of luck), a letter of resignation as an adult.

Thursday, May 4, 2000 @ 10:36 p.m. - Comment

Three's cumpany...

Via Flutterby, who apparently has a sicker mind than me (thank ghod :-), proof that Flash is actually useful for something.

[ Adult material alert: if you can't think for yourself and turn the damn channel if you're offended, don't go here... ]

Thursday, May 4, 2000 @ 10:20 p.m. - Comment

What to do if...

the pilot has a heart attack (or the parachute fails to open).

[ Thanks to /usr/bin/girl ]

Wednesday, May 3, 2000 @ 02:19 p.m. - Comment

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Copyright (C) 2000, Ashworth & Associates, All Rights Reserved, All Wrongs Reversed.

If you're down here it's because you decided you wanted to link to me. Wow. Cool. Thanks. :-)

I use Phil Greenspun's clicktracking system to keep track of my traffic, and I like to use it on inbound links too, when possible; it's interesting to know where the traffic comes from, and theCounter isn't quite as spiffy as I'd like. If you could use the following link code to link to me, I'd appreciate it:

Link Text

just copy the link and make up a YOURTAG that's somewhat descriptive. Thanks again for your trouble...

Um, d'oh! Wes Felter points out that it would be nice if the link pointed to *me*... Fixed.

And for those people who think I'm trying to be subversive with the status line crap, it's merely functional: *I* like to be able to see the URL, too. If anyone has suggestions on the (I think insoluble) 'making the link change color if you saw it somewhere else' problem, I'd love to hear them.

No, it's not.

Google finally spidered me a while back... but it's not really up to dealing with weblogs; it doesn't check often enough. The Freefind searchbox at the top of this page spiders me almost every day; retry your search there, if you're still motivated enough. :-)